Jerusalem Diary - Entry 1

 

by Simon Jacobson
OLD CITY JERUSALEM, Monday, August 13, 2001

“Don’t tell me how to do my job” are the first words I hear yelled at us by our Israeli cab driver when asked how long we will have to wait before we get going. After a bumpy ride on the 'sheirut' (shuttle) from the airport to Jerusalem, I meet my son, Menachem Mendel, in the Jewish Quarter parking lot. -- Am unsure whether the abrasive driver was in a bad mood or had developed a distaste for us passengers, as he made sure to speed up whenever we passed over a bump in the road. Oh well, rude on the outside but I'm sure soft on the inside. Classic Israeli. You gotta love them. Right off the plane and I feel right at home.

Enter the guest house of my good friends Ronnie and Chaya Vance on Rechov Maamodot Yisroel in the Old City, who so graciously hosted me. I met Ronny 15 years ago when he came to my class in New York. He was a music publishing honcho living in Bel Air, California, and now 15 years and many more experiences later is living with his lovely wife in the Old City... (more on this later).

Must say hello to The Wall – ‘The Wall’ plain and simple is the only name that resonates.  Descend the many steps and enter the haunting and eternal square, with The Wall staring down, silently waiting for me and so many others to arrive.

Tuesday, August 14

I take a stroll through Jerusalem. From the Old City to Meah Shearim. Dressed like a tourist in casual dress, I easily eavesdrop on a conversation on the main street of Meah Shearim (this main street, mind you, is about 10 feet narrow). In fluent Yiddish of my mother tongue two chareidishe Yidden (aka Ultra-orthodox, right wing extremists in New York Times lingo) are discussing the virtues of Avrohom Avinu (our Patriarch Abraham). Briefly (without capturing the power of the Yiddish nuances) one of them is passionately explaining to his friend that the uniqueness of Abraham was his non-conformity; he stood alone in his search for G-d, and committed to it despite the socials pressures around him; he went against the entire trend of the times.

"We must be proud of our heritage, and never conform to the secular standards around us," the bearded man exclaimed, with his colleague nodding in agreement.

Something bothered me. So, me in my tee-shirt, startle them with my question in their Yiddish: Aren't you conformists – embracing the standards of Yiddishkeit you were brought up with? Why are you not learning from Avrohom to do "lech lecho," leave your comfort zones and spread Yiddishkeit to the world around you?

They remained standing, wondering where this infidel comes from, utterly convinced that only their approach was right (and they are correct from a certain perspective: they are uncompromising in maintaining the timeless Jewish tradition), and I sauntered off to my next stop: Breakfast with my son in Geulah (just bordering west of Meah Sheorim), another ultra-orthodox enclave, not quite so ancient, more cell phones and ATM's, wider streets.

I shouldn't neglect to mention my brief walk-in into a bank in Meah Sheorim, which I could not resist: Seeing Jews clad in centuries-old garb withdrawing funds, filling in deposit slips, standing in line without bullet-proof windows – seeing this convergence of the archaic and the modern – was simply a remarkable bridge to witness. Well, I guess Abraham's message is beginning to infiltrate – at least in the banking world of Meah Sheorim.

Breakfast at the kosher bagel shop was unmemorable. Could have been in Boro Park, Brooklyn. Onto my next destination.

Crossing over Rechov Yaffo (Yaffo Street) from Geulah into Ben Yehudah is a trip from the religious to the secular. Faces and dress slowly change, each block changing the balance from all black hats to partial ones. Entering Ben Yehudah there is a 50/50 mix. Further along, the balance becomes primarily secular, with occasional kipot.

I stop to speak with a two teenagers, in jeans, pierced bodies with dangling rings, shaved heads. We speak in Hebrew. "Why do you live here?" I ask Roni and Sharon. "Because we were born here." "Will you stay here after you settle down?" "Not sure," they answer. "Why would you stay in a country where your children will be drafted into the army, with a high casualty rate, 50% of the budget goes to defense; why not live in NY, LA, Sydney or Bangkok," I inquire.

"It's true," Roni tells me, "I am an aspiring musician, and I am sure that I can do better in the States." "Is there anything that draws you to this land of Israel, the Promised Land?" "Not really, not really -- except that we do feel very Jewish..."

I began to cry, sincerely. Here in a five minute conversation in Ben Yehudah, in front of Cafe Remon, an entire history was captured. Both the tragedy and the ecstasy of the Jewish people hovered before my eyes.

I had no real agenda coming to Israel. Actually, for the first time in my life, I came here without any plans. And when you don't make your own plans that get in the way, G-d's true plan for you appears. I saw Israel for the first time with much purer eyes, breathed its air, smelt its scents – experienced Israel from its perspective rather than my own.

And then -- with lingering thoughts of my conversation with the Israeli teens -- I walk over to the fateful corner of Sbarros', at the intersection of Yaffo and King George. Lit candles commemorating the fatalities reflect wildly in the aluminum sheets boarding the entire storefront. A man is saying Kaddish for the lost ones. Withered flowers lay scattered on the ground. Eerie indifference as people walked by doing their business, feigning obliviousness to the danger around. "We have no choice but to treat this as another crime in our neighborhood. We cannot afford to live as if we are under siege of war," was the way one Jerusalem resident put it.

What bizarre distortions result from a 'war' that no one acknowledges is war. In some ways I understood the need to 'declare war,' at least it offers the clarity of a distinct and visible enemy. What psychologically warped demons are created when you live in a state of war deceiving yourself as if there is no war?

Standing and staring at this corner, juxtaposed to my conversation with the Israeli teens just moments ago, framed an image in my mind that I cannot easily forget:

No Israeli, no Jew in Israel or abroad, no Israeli official can state Israel's position regarding its land, borders and attitude to the Arab population. How is it that intelligent Jews, Jews who have opinions about anything from A to Z, should not have a clear-cut position on such a life and death matter?!

And the answer came to me in the voice of the earringed teenagers: We do not know why we belong here in this country! The Arabs know (or think they know) why they are here, and thus have a position that they want it all. The Jews -- many of them -- don't really know why they are living here. How can they be expected to have a position. Lack of surety must lead to ambiguity.

I asked the teens, "Tell me what would make you want to really stay here in Israel?" Zionism gave them a language, a culture, even a country, but it failed to give them the single and only vital ingredient to connection: A SOUL. They have no conscious soul connection to the land.

Israeli rock star Aviv Geffen said it pointedly: "Tov lomus b'ad atzmenu," (it’s good to die for our selves), twisting the noble national motto "tov lomus b'ad artzenu." (it’s good to die for our country). He expressed the mood of thousands: we have no allegiance to this land…

And then I walked back slowly, deliberately to the Old City. To The Wall. Where it all plays itself out. As you walk down the steps from the Jewish Quarter you see the two looming mosque domes, one golden one dark gray, receding, disappearing as you descend into the arms and bosom of The Wall for some momentary solace.

But then you walk back up and see the entire panorama, all the elements, Jewish, Arab, Christian. And then you think again, and have no choice but to look with Rabbi Akiva's eyes as he laughed...

*****

Afterthoughts:

You can only cry over Jewish divisiveness. What a bizarre combination of characters on the Israeli scene – in Meah Shearim Jews are preoccupied with non-conformity, teenagers by contrast have no clue what they are doing in Israel, in between you have persuasions of every sort and shape. Each group has no relationship with the other. Is it possible that a divisive people can have a unified position regarding the land?

The sheer divisiveness of the people in Israel reflects the soul disconnection we are experiencing. How else can you explain a nation so divided. Without recognizing our essential neshomo connection as ONE unique nation we lose our relationship with this unique land. As another enemy of Israel once said about the Jewish people: “There is one singular nation spread and dispersed between all the other nations, and their faith is different than all other nations. One nation – one soul, one country. One force with diverse expressions. But when we are not one but many, disconnected from our singular soul, we inevitably don’t feel our integral soul connection to Israel.

Jews in America and other countries can perhaps delude themselves into feeling prosperous and comfortable even with no distinct spiritual identity. However in Israel, physical survival is linked with Jewishness; not knowing what you are doing there as a Jew, is a matter of life and death…

Perhaps this present crisis in Israel is a wake up call to us all – both living in Israel and abroad – forcing us to ask the question: what does it mean to be Jewish, and how is it essential to our very survival.

People everywhere have begun asking this very question.

And the wise question is half an answer. Perhaps that is good enough reason to begin laughing, together with Rabbi Akiva: the laughter of seeing the answer within the question…



Abandonment & Reconciliation
Are We Victims?
A Little Advice about Peace & War
Crisis in Israel: Can True Peace be Achieved?
Esau Ishmael & Sinai
From Jerusalem to East Hampton
From Jerusalem to New York - Diary
From Lebanon to Jerusalem
Interesting Paradoxes: Clarity in a World of Contradictions
Israel - The Inside Story
Jerusalem Diary: 2004 Edition
Jerusalem Diary - Entry 1
Jerusalem Diary - Entry 2
Jerusalem under Siege
Ownership of the Land
Radiant Caution - On Love & War
The Birth of Projection
The Root of Arab Rage
The Ultimate Peace Plan
The Wilderness and the Torah
What Can I do about the Ongoing Killings in Israel?
What Can We Do about the Situation in Israel?
When War is Peace
Where are our Leaders?

 



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