The Cycle of Forgiveness

Your birth is G-d saying that You Matter, that you have an indispensable contribution to make to the world. Since your contribution is essential, no problem can impede you from achieving the purpose for which you were created. G-d gives you the resources to overcome every pain and obstacle, to heal from every hurt or abuse.

The ability to forgive is one of the resources that G-d has given you. But it is up to you to use it. Forgiveness in Hebrew is "mechilah," which connects to the root of the word "mochul," meaning a circle. Life is meant to be a circle encompassing all our experiences and relationships in one harmonious, seamless, whole. When someone hurts us the circle is broken. Forgiveness is the way we mend the fracture.

Forgiveness means not merely forgiving the person who hurt us, but forgiving ourselves, forgiving G-d, forgiving even life itself with all its bizarre and often cruel twists and turns.

Forgiveness is letting go and building the confidence necessary to experience healthy and positive growth. It is declaring that you will no longer remain locked in the past as a victim of circumstances; that you will no longer perpetuate negative life-patterns through blame and anger; that you will instead access the strength and love that G-d gives you day by day, moment by moment in order to fulfill the unique and singular purpose for which you and only you were created.

Forgiveness requires work. But, most importantly, it requires a connection to G-d, the Giver of life. When you remember that your birth is G-d’s way of saying You Matter, that you are vital and important, irreplaceable and essential to the perfection of G-d’s world, then you can rise above the pain others have caused you and find the love and strength to forgive both them and yourself.

When you forgive, the circle is again complete and you find yourself encompassed by the whole of G-d’s creation and feel yourself to be an integral part. When you forgive, you have taken control of your life, rather than being a victim of it.