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by Chaya Shuchat
And G-d blessed them and said to them: Be fruitful and
multiply, fill up the earth and subdue it; and rule over
the fish of the sea, the bird of the sky and every living
thing that moves on the earth.
Bereishit 1:28
And G-d said to the serpent:
I will place enmity
between you [the serpent] and the woman, and between your
offspring and her offspring
To the woman He said: I
will greatly increase your suffering and your child bearing,
in pain shall you bear children. Yet your craving shall be
for your husband, and he will rule over you
To Adam
He said: Because you listened to the voice of your wife and
ate of the tree about which I commanded you saying, You
shall not eat of it, cursed is the ground because of
you; with suffering shall you eat of it all the days of your
life. Thorns and thistles shall it sprout for you, and you
shall eat the herb of the field. By the sweat of your brow
shall you eat bread, until you return to the ground from which
you were taken.
Bereishit 3:15-19
Are children one of life's greatest blessings? Ask any new
parents and they will surely agree. But raising children
also has a flip side, which is difficult to ignore. There
are the physical stresses of pregnancy and childbirth. There
are the taxing chores associated with child-care, and the
emotionally wrenching job of patiently training contrary youngsters
into caring, responsible and mature adults. Add to that the
financial burden of supporting a growing family, and it is
perhaps not surprising that many people choose to eschew child-raising
altogether, or at least drastically limit the size of their
family.
There are other arguments commonly offered to support this
movement towards family planning. There is concern that the
children in a large family will suffer if they are forced
to share their parents' time, attention and possessions with
too many siblings. Would it not be fairer to have fewer children,
and offer each of them more comforts and luxuries? Finally,
there is the projected societal cost of each new soul brought
into the world. Can the earth's resources be infinitely taxed?
As a safeguard to the earths limited resources, maybe
we should exercise restraint, and avoid a potential global
crisis brought about through over-population.
How did it come about that another human being, even ones
own child, may be perceived as a burden, a potential threat
to our personal well-being? We need to look back to the first
parents in history, Adam and Chava[1].
Originally, their bodies were created to experience parenting
as nothing but joy and a blessing. Childbirth was to be effortless
and pain-free. The earth was designed to bring forth its
bounty spontaneously, without any need for intense labor on
the part of man.
What changed all that was their decision to eat the fruit
of the Tree of Knowledge of good and evil. From that moment,
their bodies underwent a marked change. Childbirth would contain
an element of difficulty and pain. Raising children would
no longer be an exclusively joyous, harmonious experience.
Instead, it would also include moments of strife, tension,
and emotional distress. Physical sustenance would cease to
flow forth gratis; man would need to invest tremendous effort
to provide himself and his family with the necessities of
survival.
What was it about eating from the tree that provoked such
a drastic transformation? The "knowledge" that Adam
and Chava acquired through tasting its fruit was self-awareness.
Prior to eating the forbidden fruit, Adam and Chava were not
aware of themselves as independent entities, distinct from
G-d. The universe existed in a pristine state because it was
an unequivocal reflection of its Divine Master. Each element
of creation recognized its unique place in the Divine plan,
and thus performed its distinct function flawlessly, in complete
harmony with every other component.
Through eating of the Tree of Knowledge, Adam and Chava introduced
a note of discord into the previously integral universe. As
"they opened their eyes, and realized their nakedness[2]", they simultaneously opened the eyes of
every other creature[3].
For the first time, a created being had asserted its own will,
in defiance of the Divine will. Suddenly, the formerly docile
animals developed angry and predatory tendencies; the previously
generous earth became contrary and unpredictable. Previously
synergetic organisms would now be forced to deal with hostility
and conflict. From that time on, there would be an element
of tension between man and the animal kingdom, between the
sexes, between man and nature, between parents and children,
and perhaps most striking and most devastating of all, within
the body itself[4]. Adam and Chava chose to set themselves apart
from creation, to be "like G-d[5]",
independent and liberated. However, their independence came
at a cost, not only to themselves but also to all of creation.
Since then we have struggled to regain that state of perfect
unity that had previously reigned. Adam and Chava were the
first to introduce self-consideration as a factor in determining
behavior, with all the accompanying disunity that it brought
in consequence. However, there is one element which remained
unaffected by the sin, and it is this one element which is
our inherent hope of returning the world to its original glory.
By inviting conflict into the world through ignoring the
divine commandment, Adam and Chava thereby disconnected themselves
from their divine source. But within them still remained a
part that never lost its connection to G-d, and in fact, felt
deeply ashamed and humiliated by the breach that they had
caused. Every soul is a spark of G-d, and all the friction
and coarseness of the universe can never completely extinguish
it, or separate it from its divine source. Every additional
soul born adds to the sum total of G-dly energy at work in
this world; building, repairing, and creating. The damage
done by Adam and Chava can yet be undone. It can be undone
by devoting ourselves to the G-dly task of bringing more children
into this world, and dedicating our full energies to their
needs, their upbringing, and their nurturing.
Yes, raising children is often difficult, time-consuming
and exasperating. Our wills clash with theirs; our bodies
cry out for respite. Yet limiting the number of children born
means restricting the total G-dly energy available for rebuilding
the world in the light of divine precepts. We can bring
up children to overcome selfishness and cruelty. We can
instill in them a desire for morality, for values, for respect
of themselves and others. But we cannot do that when we place
physical possessions, or personal ambitions, above the value
of another life, another child born.
Can the family bear the stress of additional members, more
mouths to feed, more bodies and souls and psyches in need
of attention and nurturing? A truer question is, can the family
bear the stress of restricting birth; of repressing the divine
urge to procreate, and denying siblings the opportunity to
learn sharing, caring and giving. The unity of the marriage
and the family grows only stronger when all members make room
in their hearts and lives for more children.
"Overpopulation" need not be a dominant concern.
Human beings are tremendously resourceful, and are continually
providing new solutions to maximize the earth's productive
capability. The course of human history has proven that it
is not the number of people in the world that determines whether
there is hunger, decay or violence. In Cain's view, the world
was not large enough for him to share with his only brother,
Abel. The population of the generation of the flood was considerably
smaller than today's, yet they suffered from rampant chaos
and utter anarchy. There was no family structure, no justice
system, no moral laws whatsoever. The society was so irredeemably
evil that there was no recourse but complete destruction.
Had there been fewer individuals, would that have forestalled
that society's descent into rampant self-indulgence and narcissism?
Projections regarding our future ability to sustain a growing
population are based only upon the knowledge and technology
available today. Imagine scientists 500 years ago attempting
to engineer a massive birth control effort based on the medical,
agricultural and societal conditions that existed in the 16th
century. They could never have foreseen the earth being able
to sustain even a fraction of today's population.
Preventing births from occurring will do little to curtail
the burgeoning population of broken, dispirited individuals
who feel little sense of hope or purpose to their existence.
But joyously welcoming a new child, or many children, into
the family will be sure to increase the population of self-assured,
contented adults who are secure in their divine purpose, and
are actively working to attain their goal.
Each child born is a light unto himself, with the potential
to illuminate the lives of many others. Each child that we
bear and nurture is a new channel of divine blessing and goodness.
Far from being a drain on the world's resources, the child
is the greatest resource that the earth could possibly produce.
As parents, we have the duty to instill within the child the
sense of self-worth, of purposefulness and mission necessary
for building and recreating a harmonious world. But it is
the children, with their irrepressible enthusiasm and unspoiled
optimism, who will be the ones to make it happen. They will
be the first to triumphantly herald a new era of peace, perfection
and unity; the era of Moshiach.
[1] Chava is Hebrew for Eve and means mother
of life.
[2] Bereishit, 3:7 "Nakedness" is an allusion
to their acquisition of self-awareness. As long as they
were aware of themselves solely as divine creations, their
bodies were holy, and thus there was no shame attached to
their nakedness. However, by eating of the fruit, they
invoked in themselves the possibility of personal, unholy
desires. The body thus lost its status of being a perfect
vehicle for G-dliness, and became a coarse vessel, of which
they felt ashamed.
[3] Rashi on Bereishit, 3:6
[5] Bereishit 3:5, Rashi 3:6
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