How to Give Yourself Motherly Love


Whether your mother is present in your life or not, each one of us needs to give ourselves motherly love. Motherly love fosters a sense of security and dignity — and you can give yourself the nurturing that you need regardless of whether your mother gave it to you or not, or is present now (or not). Try the following.

Pursue Dignity

Dignity is the feeling of confidence and security that comes from knowing that you have inherent value and are indispensable, by virtue of the fact that you were created in the Divine Image. The antithesis to dignity is a sense of worthlessness, shame, insecurity, low self-esteem, sometimes to the point of self-loathing. When a mother lovingly cradles her child in her arms and the child’s eyes meet the mother’s affectionate eyes, the child receives the message: “I am wanted and needed in this world. I have a comfortable place where I will always be loved. I have nothing to fear. I feel like royalty in my heart.”

Take a moment and concentrate on yourself, on your true inner self, not on your performance and how you project to others. What makes your inner self feel wholesome and dignified? Give yourself the gift of doing something or being somewhere that makes you feel dignified. 

Go to Your Soul

Another word for your soul is “inner child”. And that child needs to be nurtured by your “inner mother”. No matter how old you are, each of us has our inner child intact. Nothing can be healthier than getting – and staying – in touch with your child, with your own innocent essence. Embrace her, kiss her, laugh with her, cry for and with her – commit to activities (in thought, speech and action) that caress your soul and allow her to actualize in this world.

Are you fulfilling your soul’s mission? Do you know your soul’s mission? When you learn about your soul and live a soul-driven life, your soul’s vitality then becomes a hub that connects all the fragmented spokes of your life. You will be nurturing your inner child in the way that a mother nurtures her youngster.  

Practice Loving-Kindness

Your compassion – toward yourself and toward others – helps the mother within you to do her work. Be kind and gentle with yourself. If your own mother spoke to you harshly, speak to yourself the way that you wish she had spoken to you. If you were blessed with a healthy and nurturing mother, rise above your self-perception and try to see yourself the way that she sees you — as someone worthy of unconditional love. 

Work on meeting your own specific needs rather than suppressing them. Find new ways to express loving-kindness to yourself and to others. Explore what loving-kindness and compassion are, and use them to strengthen your dignity.

Exercise: How do you nurture yourself? Envision treating your inner child the way it needs to be treated. Act on it.  Journal about it in your MyMLC journal.

Go deeper into this subject: A Mother’s Tears | I am a Child and I Believe | Your Guide to Personal Freedom: Counting the Omer Week Seven | Dancing Particles

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