Netzavim Rosh Hashana: Give Me Your Soul

Save Our Children

Rosh Hashana Suggestion

Save Our Children

It is easier to build strong children than to repair broken men — Frederick Douglass

Jews have an expression: Mit an eitzeh shlogt men zich nit on. We don’t dispense unsolicited advice.

But at times, it may be worth making a suggestion. Especially considering the unique challenges we all face today.

So as we are about to enter a new year, which brings with it new and unprecedented energy and opportunity, please allow me to make a suggestion. We can call it a Rosh Hashana resolution. Hopefully it will be received well.

Over the years I have written much about the vital importance of finding your personal life mission statement. If a business cannot function without one, how can we?

This is the central theme of Rosh Hashana, the collective birthday of the human race, when the human being was created in the divine image, with a distinct and irreplaceable role to achieve in transforming existence.

The absolute significance of each life – that each of us is indispensable and was sent to earth on a mission that you and only you can accomplish – is the most critical ingredient in life and the foundation of all of Torah and Judaism.

Without this foundation – that you and everything you do matters now and forever – any expectation of us and any choice we make is rendered negligible. What significance can there be to any mitzvah, and to any moral virtue and social responsibility, if our lives have no meaning or arbitrary meaning?

Rosh Hashana then provides us with the greatest possible gift: The renewal of our divine contract and mandate – the renewal of our divinely endowed mission and all the resources we need to realize this mission.

On this extraordinary day we are charged anew with the single most essential force in life: The dignity of your immutable value.

The importance of this cannot be overstated. No words can express the significance of our indispensability.

Imagine waking up every day knowing that you have a job to do that no one else but you can accomplish. That the entire world is waiting in anticipation for you to fulfill your role. And if you don’t do your part, now one else can fulfill their roles. Imagine that you are carrying the baton in your leg of a long marathon, and if you drop the baton or do not run your leg, everyone else is compromised. Imagine that you are an astronaut in space and if you don’t press the right button all of humanity hangs in the balance.

Imagine that every second of the day, every fiber of your being, feels how your next act changes the course of destiny.

If you felt this sense of urgency and this confidence all the time, how many problems would it pre-empt? How much heartache, aggravation, and therapy it would prevent; how much money, time and resources it would save!

Think about that for a minute: If you don’t feel like you make a difference in the world, how excited can you be about the things you do and the choices you make? When you wake up in the morning and you feel like what you do that day doesn’t matter anyway, how committed or passionate can you be?

This simple, clear message is the best preventive medicine for much of the troubles plaguing our world today, much if not all of which stems from one root: A deep void and lack of feeling that you and your actions are absolutely significant. That you are a necessary player in the scheme of existence, and your choices and actions always matter.

We need to reach to every person, to every child, every parent, every educator, every leader, with the message: You matter. Your life and what you do with it matters. You are indispensable to G-d and to this world.

*  *  *

A few weeks ago a couple approached me with their little children and asked me to bless their children for the New Year.  I gave them a blessing, and then, without much thought, I turned to the parents and smilingly said: And G-d should bless you and all us adults that we not corrupt our pure and innocent children.

Words provoke.  Spontaneously, the mother asks me: what do you suggest we can do to ensure that our children grow up the healthiest they can be and do not get corrupted by the adult world? If there were one thing we can do, what would it be?

“What a great question,” I said to myself and to her.

I will share with you my response, as a suggestion all parents around the world – a Rosh Hashana resolution:

On this Rosh Hashana let us all begin a new custom – a gift to our children:

Every morning upon awakening and every evening before putting your children to sleep – and as many times as you can throughout the day – tell your child (in addition to any words of love you usually convey to your child):

— (Obviously, you can and ought to customize this with your own words, and also tailor to the specific age and comprehension of your child. But here is an idea that you can either use or adapt). —

“Your soul was sent here to earth to accomplish a mission that you and only you can accomplish. Always remember that.

“You have a special song inside of you. A melody that has never been sung before. A beautiful song that will change everything you encounter.

“Wherever you go, whatever you do, whomever you meet – everything is waiting for you to sing your song.  For you to shine with your special glow. For you to paint your unique portrait. For you to contribute your irreplaceable verse.”

In the Morning

Each morning, take your child’s hand and place it on his or her heart, and tell your child: “Your warm and special soul has just returned to you fresh and new. You were given this soul today anew so that you use it to illuminate and warm everyone and everything you come in contact with today.”

You can easily use the Modeh Ani prayer, which we say upon awakening, to express this message: Modeh ani lefonecho melech chai v’kayom, she’hechezarto bi neshmosi b’chemloh rabbo emunosecho. I offer thanks before you, living and eternal King, for You have mercifully restored my soul within me; Your faithfulness is great.

These words contain many ideas. One of them is the message of indispensability: Thank you for returning my unique soul, for making me special and imbuing me with an indispensable mission, for having faith in me.

“I am so excited to see you again this morning, my dear child.

“The world would be very different if you weren’t here. As you awake know that you have a new day ahead of you in which you have a critical role to play.

“You are absolutely necessary. You are indispensable to G-d’s vision of the world, chosen to fulfill a mission in this world that you and only you can accomplish.”

After School or At the End of the Day

As the day ends ask your child how he sang his special song that day. How she contributed and brought light to another person. Depending on the age and comprehension of the child, find ways to elicit form your child how he or she fulfilled their mission that day.

In the Evening

Every night before putting your children to sleep say to them:

“My dear and beautiful child, your special soul will now be returning to its source, to replenish itself with energy from the wellsprings of life.

“You surely used this day well, and showed G-d that He did well in placing His confidence in you.

“Now, return your soul and sleep well.”

Here too you can insert the evening prayer: Beyodcho afkid ruchi, podiso oisi Hashem Kel emes. In Your hand I entrust my spirit, You have redeemed me Hashem G-d of truth.

All Day Every Day

No number of times is enough to infuse our children with the cognizance of – and confidence in – their souls. In our material world, which relentlessly assaults our spirits, we can always use more energy to counter the attack.

Remember, children are naturally spiritual. As they grow and increasingly immerse into the material world they will assimilate and be impacted (by the toxins) of materialism. So the more we arm them with spiritual resources, the bigger the arsenal we provide them, and reinforce their confidence in their unique soul’s mission, the more powerful they will be and the more strength and courage they will have when they have to deal with the formidable and relentless demands and pressures of material life.

Therefore, whenever you have an opportunity to remind your child about his or her unparalleled spiritual mission, never hesitate to do so, even if it means again and again and again.

Is there a limit to how many times you can express love to your beloved? There is also no limit to how many times you can convey dignity and significance to you children.

Our Great Responsibility

There can be no keener revelation of a society’s soul than the way in which it treats its children (as Nelson Mandela said).

It is time to create a revolution – to refocus our priorities and invest our energies into the most premium of all our gifts: Our children. And remember: It is easier to build strong children than to repair broken men.

Now let us envision what our child will look like as he or she grown into an adult saturated with not just with our love and nurturing, but also with a profound and intimate sense of purpose and urgency.

Imagine a child turned adult who has heard this message every day after day:

“You matter, not because you think you are important, or because others tell you that you are, or because of your buying power, monetary value, looks, performance or productivity level. But because G-d put you here. You are an indispensable musical note. Irreplaceable. Period. The world would be different if you were not here or if you do not fulfill your calling. You have been allotted a certain section of this globe, with certain talents; people you will meet; experiences you will have; places you will go; objects you will obtain – all are allocated to you in order for you to transform them, to leave them differently from how you found them. And this change lives forever. Eternally.

“You don’t just matter to me and your family; you matter to the entire world. You matter to all the worlds and the cosmos. You matter to all the souls in heaven who have been here before us. And above all: You matter to G-d.

“G-d personally chose you and sent your soul down to us here. To accomplish things that only you can accomplish.

“Never ever forget that.”

Blessed is the child that will grow up with this message ingrained in his every move.

Blessed is the world that will be filled with such children.


Did you enjoy this? Get personalized content delivered to your own MLC profile page by joining the MLC community. It's free! Click here to find out more.

Notify of
Oldest Most Voted
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
11 years ago

Now I understand why Picasso said, Learn from the children.

11 years ago

This is a beautiful message, it is an even more important message for older people whos children are grown or werent blessed with children. Sometimes our purpose becomes less clear as we age. I would love this message to work for these people in as beautiful a way as it does for people raising children.

Thanks for the inspiration!

Harry Pearle
11 years ago

Thank you Rabbi Jacobson for your wisdom. I will have to think about it more. But let me suggest a simple New Years resolution: Show Up.

What do I mean by Show Up? A simple example is this comment I am sending you. I am showing up by sending it, right now. I can show up, by davening with a minyan, every day. I can show up in many ways.

Showing up takes some courage and caring and some preparation. Maybe by showing up I can advance my personal mission, step by step, one day at the time, one moment at a time…


11 years ago

I was just talking this morning with someone who was telling me how senseless her life was and how she wished she could leave this world as quicly as possible. Now i can tell her that she has a unique purpose and how much she matters to the world. Ill try to remember this for myself when i too see life as terribly insignificant… thanks a lot. Shana tova to you and your team. God bless.

11 years ago

My children are in their 40s and our relationship seems to be – on their part – at best nebign neglect. Their mother and I have been divorced over twenty years. My son and I do not communicate and communication with my daughter is very limited. I reach out and my overtures are ignored. Any ideas? Thank you

Fay Russell
11 years ago

Thank you Rabbi, for this beautiful and inspiring message.

Sally Dietz
11 years ago

Thank you for your healing message.
I have waited a life time to hear this message stated is such a way as to be so meaningful and so important to all children and to all adults who missed this message as children. God Bless you always.

11 years ago

Thanks, beautiful words, but what about someone that doesnt have children? Should he/she repeat themselves how precious they are?
Shana Tova Umetuca

11 years ago

Great article passed on its message You matter! Your life and what you do with it matters. You are indispensable to God and to this world. How often we forget this truth.

Simply Jewish
11 years ago

Do we follow advices or not is not the question. Are we aware of our role is. As parents, as friends, as teachers and etc? And are we willing to back up our words with actions? Are we ready to walk next to our children, trust them and support them if their dreams and how they are seeing their purpose in life does not agree with what we see or want for them?

In regards to article : totally agree. Was telling exactly that to my children for last 30+ years. Still do. To make more dramatic wrote and recorded song with the same messages. What is my role as a mother – A Dream Catcher . That is one of them. …Catching Dream of my children and nurtiting a confidence so they can go after them with out flicging

11 years ago

Everything you have written or taught has been brilliant but this has been one of the best articles; I teach Hebrew school and try to bring this kind of compassion to the children in my classroom. I will share this article with the other instructors and parents of the children in my class. Todah rabah vshana tova!

11 years ago

I do not argue with anything you wrote here, but it does not answer my question – just as hundreds of other books & articles have never answered it. I know I am here for something – but WHAT? How do I find out? I can see limited purpose in raising my child, but she is growing, and then what? This cant alone be IT. Days do seem meaningless beyond this childs nurture and care. How do I find this unique mission beyond temporary roles I play in life?

11 years ago

So important and crystal clear message!
People like you prove that Israel is light to the nations.

Sandy Lupowitz Freid
11 years ago

I cried reading this whole piece. It touched me deeply. I see how it relates to how we speak to our inner child as well, especially for those of us who tend to forget that our light and our note are a unique and essential part of this lightshow/symphony of life.

11 years ago

Thank you for this beautiful touching commentary filled with such love and profound wisdom. I strongly feel these sentiments in my heart for my children but never quite would have said them out loud. I wonder how their life would be made different if they heard these words often. I wonder how my life wouldve been made different had I heard these words just once. Thank you. Shana Tova Umatuka! Love and Blessings to all!

Agnes Santha
11 years ago

Thank you for this wonderful New Year message, I have found it very important also for my own inner child, besides that I do work with children and nurture others in need. To emphasize the uniqueness of each person, I thought it would be more appropriate to coin a comparison that is not as limited as the number of musical notes are. Im still thinking to find a suitable comparison. Would colors have more variatons than musical notes? The real meaning of this message is in the variance of an individual with the combination of the present surrounding world, which makes miriads of varieties… Happy New Year to All!

Alyssa Reit
11 years ago

Dear Rabbi,

This is a deeply beautiful and healing article. I do believe in my heart that what you write is true. And I can also see that part of me that hardly dares to really embrace the truth of it. I hope all those who read it will indeed take it in and take your inspiring message to heart, and follow through with your wonderful suggestion. It would indeed be a changed world!

Best Regards and many thanks,

Alyssa Reit

11 years ago

What a beautiful, touching and essential message you write. Although my children are now grown, they will always be my babies/children and I never cease to tell them how very special their essence is. Oh, and they are great kids & human beings. Of course I will not & cannot take credit for that, I have been Blessed by G-d.
Thank you Rabbi for this and all your writings, inspirations, sharing your knowledge and for your commitment to us Jews and humanity.

Pat McDonough
11 years ago

This beautiful piece was sent to me, a Catholic. Thank you, Rabbi. Your words and wisdom will stay with me throughout my days…

The Meaningful Life Center