Forgiveness Starts With Yourself: Jewish Wisdom on Letting Go and Reclaiming Inner Peace
Have you ever noticed how holding onto resentment can weigh you down, almost as if you’re giving someone else free rent in your mind? Many find themselves replaying past hurts, feeling trapped in patterns of anger or the longing for closure that never seems to come.
Rabbi Simon Jacobson offers a refreshing perspective—one that begins with compassion for ourselves and reframed expectations for others. Through Jewish wisdom, forgiveness emerges as a journey toward inner freedom and self-discovery, offering a path out of the cycle of pain.
A New Way to Understand Forgiveness
Often, we see forgiveness as something owed to others—a moral duty to pardon those who may have wronged us. But as Rabbi Jacobson teaches, true forgiveness starts within. By letting go of anger and victimhood, you don’t only release others; you unlock your own potential for peace and personal growth.
Consider the story of a sibling relationship strained by years of hurt—one sister continues to see her sibling only for the sake of family gatherings, yet feels the sting of unresolved conflict. In such situations, focusing only on the other person’s actions perpetuates a cycle of pain. Rabbi Jacobson encourages a shift: instead of waiting for amends that may never come, turn inward and begin healing with self-compassion, recognizing your own worth beyond the wounds inflicted by others.
The Price of Holding On
Resentment is like an anchor, dragging your emotions and energy into the past. Jewish teachings, echoed in Rabbi Jacobson’s wisdom, invite you to ask: How much energy do you give to grudges that could instead nourish your growth? Holding on can leave little space for joy or connection—placing control of your well-being in someone else’s hands.
Rabbi Jacobson points out that real strength comes from courageously letting go of the “victim mentality.” This isn’t about denying pain, but about choosing not to allow it to define you. By reframing the narrative, you can reclaim agency over your life and open the door to new possibilities in relationships and self-fulfillment.
Practical Steps to Begin Forgiving
- Start with Self-Inquiry: Take a quiet moment to reflect—are there grudges or unresolved hurts taking up space in your mind? Notice how they affect your mood and interactions.
- Shift Perspective: Try to see the situation from a broader view. Sometimes, those who hurt us are acting from their own pain or limitations. Reframing the story can lessen its hold on your emotions.
- Release Expectations: Let go of the demand for the other person to change or even apologize. Focus on what you can control: your own healing and peace of mind.
- Affirm Your Self-Worth: Remember that your value isn’t determined by past wounds. Practice self-compassion by acknowledging your resilience and dignity.
- One Step at a Time: Forgiveness is a process. Aim for small shifts, whether it’s letting go of a single grudge, writing a letter (even if you never send it), or practicing a daily affirmation that centers your spirit.
Jewish Wisdom for Every Heart
While rooted in Jewish tradition, this approach to forgiveness speaks universally. Every person, regardless of background, can benefit from the freedom that comes with letting go. Forgiveness transforms not just your outlook but often the relationships and opportunities that come into your life.
As Moses demonstrated in his intercession for the Israelites after the golden calf, digging deeper than surface wounds reveals the possibility for redemption and growth. Your own journey can mirror this: by moving beyond what was, you create space for what can be.
Ready to explore forgiveness in a deeper way? Discover more wisdom and practical guidance by watching the full class on Rabbi Jacobson’s platform.
