Seeking Guidance: When to Turn to Books and When to Seek a Mentor—Insights from Tanya Applied
Everyone faces moments when they yearn for clarity—a crossroads where the right direction is unclear. In this search for guidance, a common dilemma arises: Should you reach out to a trusted mentor or try to find the answers in a book? This question isn’t just practical; it’s deeply human and timeless. Drawing from the profound wisdom shared in Rabbi Simon Jacobson’s Tanya Applied series, let’s explore the unique power and purpose of each source of wisdom, and how to discern the right one for your journey.
The Wisdom in Our Books
Books function as silent mentors. They provide access to centuries of insight, packaged in pages we can revisit anytime. The wisdom captured in a classic text or a contemporary guide can spark an inner breakthrough, sometimes precisely when it’s needed most.
Imagine someone feeling lost after a sudden life change—perhaps the loss of a job or an unexpected relocation. Opening a cherished book, whether Tanya, a self-help bestseller, or a favorite novel, offers comfort. It creates a sense of companionship and serves as a mirror, reflecting back paths and possibilities. Books don’t judge; they quietly provide perspectives, patterns, and reassurance, accessible at any hour.
The Unique Value of a Mentor
Yet, even the finest volume can’t respond to a trembling voice or adapt in real time. There’s a reason why, as Rabbi Jacobson notes, the Tanya itself highlights both personal mentorship and learning through texts. A mentor listens, empathizes, and customizes their advice to your unique situation. Picture a young adult wrestling with a big personal decision—someone to marry, a new path to embark on, or how to recover from a painful setback. Speaking to a caring advisor or spiritual guide brings a human dimension: feedback, follow-up, and even a gentle challenge to grow.
Finding the Right Source—Actionable Guidance
Jewish wisdom doesn’t set these two forms of learning in opposition. In Tanya Applied, Rabbi Jacobson explains that each has profound advantages and certain limitations:
- When grappling with general questions, crack open a trusted book. Learn its lessons, take notes, and reflect quietly.
- When the situation is complex, highly personal, or emotionally charged, reach out to a mentor. A real conversation can address nuances no book can predict.
- Combine both sources: After a meaningful discussion, return to the texts to deepen your understanding and reinforce practical steps.
- Build a habit of journaling after either experience, capturing your feelings, next steps, and what the experience awakened in you.
Think of this like building both strength and flexibility. Books give structure and timeless wisdom; mentors encourage growth in real time, adapting to your lived experience.
Balancing Study and Living Guidance
Whether you lean toward quiet contemplation with books or value the encouragement and wisdom of a mentor, each plays a crucial role in your spiritual and personal journey. One offers perspective through history and tradition; the other, through relationship and conversation. The result is a fuller, more responsive path to meaningful living with tools to face tomorrow’s questions with resilience and confidence.
If you’re eager to delve deeper into this dance between personal and written guidance, watch the full Tanya Applied discussion here.


