Never Define Yourself By What You Hate


If you want to be happy, here’s a golden rule: Never define yourself by those who mock you. Here’s why: The opposite of happiness is not sadness; it’s rage.

Sadness isn’t that bad. A secure person is able to be sad. She will feel the emotional experience fully, but it won’t change her perception of herself. In the midst of sadness, she will still have inner security. Her inner joy stays consistent regardless of the situation she is in. She sees life like a spiral staircase: One side of the staircase is in the sun; the other side is in the dark; but she knows she’s always moving up the staircase, connected to an infinite power.

Rage is another story. Rage demonstrates fundamental insecurity. Those who rage, it is because they have nothing internal to celebrate. Those who react violently, who scream at others, who approach life with hostility — they have one thing in common: They don’t know who they are or why they are alive. They live in reaction to what they hate. They are empty people.

Your mood and attitude on life cannot be determined by parents, by strangers, by anyone who is critical of you. The key to growth is knowing that you are no one’s victim. You are not a result of circumstances. You are an independent individual created by an infinite power. Yes, in early years we are dependent on nurturing, love, support, and the building of our self esteem by the people who are close to us. But, you are fundamentally an individual who should never ever define herself by others’ moods, likes, or dislikes.

No matter what your life has been like until now, your soul is throbbing inside you, waiting to be released. Channel it and harness it into your daily life. Energize even mundane things. When you unchain your soul, everything becomes elevated and transformed. You have cause to celebrate your life when you’re living from your soul.

Have you ever asked yourself where your passion is when nobody is inciting you? Ask yourself! Ask yourself who you are when you strip away your job, the nasty things people say to you, how much money you have or don’t have, and the things that you spend your money on. How do you think of yourself? Do you know who you are when your psyche isn’t being assaulted by messages to buy this thing, do this thing, don’t be this way? Who are you when all of the intruding voices from outside yourself are silenced?

You are an indispensable entity to a power much higher than yourself. You were put on Earth with a purpose that only you can fulfill. You can’t fulfill your purpose if you define yourself by others’ expectations. What do they know about who you really are? Nobody truly knows your soul except for the force who created it.

When you know what you stand for at the soul level, you’ll never be anybody’s victim. Know your driving force. Know your eternal values. Then no slight, no provocation, no insult, no diss will ever steal your internal joy. Your vengeance for all the wrongs done to you will be the love and light that you produce.


Go deeper into this subject: We Dance, They Rage, Joy On Demand, Functional and Dysfunctional Joy

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How Hatred Consumes and Destroys
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